Daddy Quarantine

Posted by Mission Commander on August 15, 2015 in SITREPs |

Mission DTG: 14AUG15 2200HRS Location: FOB Livingroom Biological warfare has struck the command post this week. Early on I began to show symptoms of a cold, and as the days went by my condition only got worse before it eventually started to get better. We were able to maintain our regular Op Tempo despite my […]


Newborn Reinforcements

Posted by Mission Commander on August 2, 2015 in SITREPs |

Mission DTG: 25JUL15 2300HRS Location: OP COMPDESK These last eight months dealing with this infant insurgency has been nothing short of a daunting task. From sleep deprivation to biohazards, and difficulty with rations, this command position has been one like none other either the Area Commander or myself have ever encountered. It was nearly four […]


Baby Chaos Theory Pt.1

Posted by Mission Commander on July 23, 2015 in Dad Field Manual, SITREPs |

Mission DTG: 0300 22JUL2015 Location: Bedroom District Operation Good Night has been an ongoing attempt to stabilize night time operations. The infant insurgent continues to conduct disruption operations at all hours of the night, leading to a significant impact on the Area Commander from sleep deprivation. I have been able to step in to relieve […]

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New to the K9 Squad

Posted by Mission Commander on July 18, 2015 in SITREPs |
And now I have another late night writing assistant

And Then There Were Four So I know I’ve been a bit absent this past week, but only cause we’ve been a bit busy the last couple of days. I’m sure my scores of tens of fans have been eagerly awaiting a new post with baited breath, and I figured it’d only be fair to […]


A Boy and His Dog

Posted by Mission Commander on July 4, 2015 in SITREPs |

DTG: 03JUL15 1900HRS Location: FOB Homestead Status report on the effectiveness of K9 teams on local operations. During the initial phases of Operation Enduring Baby it seemed as though the resident K9 squad remained largely indifferent to the infant insurgent now in their midst. Their ability to detect IEDs (improvised explosive diapers) seemed almost non-existent, […]

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The Importance of Solo Time with the Offspring

Posted by Mission Commander on June 30, 2015 in SITREPs |
Alright dad, let's do this!

Dad Time No, I’m not talking about hanging out with The Offspring, I’m talking about your offspring. Working full time during the week and the occasional long days at work limit the time I get to spend with my son. Most of that time in the evenings is spent tag-teaming baby duties with my wife, […]

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K9 Deployed for Explosive Diaper Detection

Posted by Mission Commander on June 22, 2015 in SITREPs |
Somethin' doesn't smell right down here Boss

Mission DTG: 22JUN15 0815HRS Location: Living room District The infant insurgent has entered the new fighting season after a period of normal conditions. Patrols have encountered a higher rate of IEDs (improvised explosove diapers) during the early morning hours as of late. With the latest reports indicating we would be facing newborn enemy reinforcements before […]

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Day 11 of Operation Homefront

Posted by Mission Commander on June 22, 2015 in SITREPs |

SitRep: Day 11 of Operation Homefront The convoy continues eastward on return to Forward Operating Base Bubba. After a couple of pitstops to refuel and acquire some hot chow the VIP passenger, codename Bubba Bear, has become difficult. As part of his PSD (Parental Security Detail) I’ve had to supervise his care along with the […]


Day 10 of the Infant Insurgency (Surprise Attack)

Posted by Mission Commander on June 21, 2015 in SITREPs |

Day 10 of the infant insurgency, 0100 hrs: the Baby Force Commander had just finished delivering rations to the local before turning control over to me to conduct Burp Ops. During operations an explosive diaper was triggered. The QRDF (Quick Reaction Diaper Force) was alerted to neutralize the device. Intel suggested the infant insurgent was […]


Day 9 of the Infant Insurgency (The Beginning of OEB)

Posted by Mission Commander on June 20, 2015 in SITREPs |

November 14th, 2014: Day 9 of the infant occupation: the tiny insurgent had nailed my co-commander with a dual threat poop-pee attack while she was on solo watch. After I joined her on the watch we were alerted to another possible IED (improvised explosive diaper). As we investigated, the little insurgent triggered his secondary device, […]

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